It is 6:00am Eastern and I should be sleeping. Or at the very least tossing and turning while my husband gets ready for work. My alarm was set for 7, and I was up by 4:47 surfing the internet on my cell phone. Am I nervous because today is the last day I will drive to Tampa to my obstetrician’s office and find out my fate with the little one? Will there be an update to say I am finally having any type of progress as my due date is in five days? Or will we wait for the hospital to contact them back and given an induction date once I am technically overdue? I can tell you my Yorkshire Terrier is not quite enthusiastic about not being able to curl back up into bed with me as I sit in the nursery typing this.
Are we every really ready? I mean in all seriousness. Marriage, it is no walk in the park at times but it is rewarding and in the end worth it to have that partner in crime who understands you on your best and worst days. Change of career? The nerves that set in trying to please the person who hired you and fearing what happens if your position is null and void at some time. Kids? People always say to wait until you are financially secure to have kids. Is anyone besides millionaires and the really rich ever truly 100% financially secure? I can’t name one friend or family member off the top of my head that does not worry about at least one bill a month or short comings in the bank. If we all waited until we were financially secure the population would be depleted pretty darn fast huh?
Yes, these are the ramblings of me at 6am on a Wednesday morning, surfing the internet trying to kill time before my drive to determine how many days left I have of being just a wife. Just a daughter. Just a friend. Just me. In a few shorts days my world is changing and for the better as I have prayed for this child. This child will rock my world sleep wise and test me in ways I have never been tested. However, my heart will grow immensely and my world will become different. We all know different is good. Change can be good. I may not be ready right now at 6am…but the moment I see his face, I know the time is right and I will be ready to step up to the plate.